


Checking Vitals

by Magic_and_Myths



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Blushing, Crushes, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Jarvis is a snitch, M/M, Okay only like four but come on that's still a lot of crushes, Poor Wade being teased about his crush, so many crushes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-23
Updated: 2016-03-23
Packaged: 2018-05-28 16:07:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6335437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magic_and_Myths/pseuds/Magic_and_Myths
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Tony notices Wade's embarrassing crush, he asks Jarvis to check the merc's vitals-including his blood flow and heart rate. Which Jarvis proceeds to announce in front of everyone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Checking Vitals

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this pairing? Totally owns my heart. ♥

Tony Stark was the first to notice it. The Avengers had begun the tradition of Thursday night movie marathons, and Steve Rogers-ever the saint-had insisted on inviting Deadpool.

 

"We're thinking of recruiting him, right?", he had asked, in his no-nonsense-I'm-Captain-America-voice. "He deserves an invite."

 

Clint and Natasha sat on the leather couch, arguing over the authenticity of a Russian classic. Bruce would chime in now and then, but seemed to be more focused on keeping Thor calm. The Norse god would exclaim loudly, seemingly in confusion, every time a movie title was said. Yet and still, Steve would patiently explain the concept of the movie to him.

 

"Jarvis?", Tony calls out to the Al.

 

"Yes, sir?"

 

"Is this movie marathon really worth it?"

 

"Captain America would believe so, sir."

 

"What? Who cares? I asked-"

 

"You asked, sir," the Al says in an amused tone. "If this move marathon was 'worth it', correct?"

 

"Correct."

 

"You are my main priority, sir. And Steve Rogers is _your_ main priority. If the movie marathon is 'worth it' to Captain America, then it is most definitely 'worth it' to you. Correct?"

 

His friends begin to snicker, and a pink flush adorns Steve's face. Tony glares at them all, before snapping at Jarvis to shut up.

 

"Of course, sir.", the Al agrees, the amused tone still present.

 

And that's when Deadpool flies in through the window, his _kantanas_ out for no fucking reason, and Tony is so glad he left that window open for Peter-

 

"Wow, a real, live Avengers slumber party! We're so glad we could be invited-"

 

"We?", Steve asks, cautiously.

 

"You know, Cap! Me and the boxes!", Deadpool cries, before flinging himself on the couch. Clint is amused and Natasha is not. Both allow him to lay on them.

 

"Okay, one.", Tony snaps. "Don't call him Cap. And, two-"

 

"Sorry, Mr. Iron Man, sir.", Deadpool somehow pouts through the mask. "I didn't mean to use your pet name for him-"

 

" _Pet name_?", Tony cries, his cheeks heating up as Clint cackles.

 

"Are we getting food? I could go for some chimichangas! Oh! Or some tacos! I make the best tacos! What? Yes, I do! Don't listen to the yellow box! He's an asshole! Anyway-"

 

"Hey, everyone.", Spider-Man says, jumping through the window, and honestly Tony had only wanted him to jump through it in the first place.

 

"Hello, Man of Spider!", Thor greets enthusiastically, and the other Avengers follow suit.

 

Peter removes his mask, and grins at them. "You finally invited Deadpool?"

 

Tony blinks at that, before glancing at the quiet mercenary. He's finally sitting up on the couch correctly between Natasha and Clint, and he's ducking his head like he's embarrassed.

 

"I've been good lately, so they're opening up!", he cries dramatically, but not as obnoxious as usual. Tony raises his eyebrows.

 

"Well, I'm proud of you for not killing people.", Peter chuckles, sitting between Deadpool and Clint.  And Clint is the second to notice.

 

Deadpool ducks his head further, muttering something like 'Knew you'd be', and Clint hears him, before grinning at Peter, amused.

 

"You know Deadpool, Pete-um, Spider-Man?"

 

"Yeah.", Peter rolls his eyes fondly. "And you can call me Peter. He knows my secret identity."

 

"What?", Bruce asks. "Even when you joined the Avengers, you wouldn't tell us. How did-"

 

"He told me his first.", Peter says solemnly, before turning to Thor and asking him about movie choices.

 

Thor's eccentric, albeit naive, responses distract all of the Avengers, except for Tony. He watches as Deadpool watches Peter. Iron Man waits patiently until... _there_. Peter turns toward Deadpool, smiling up at him, and asks his movie opinion. Deadpool fidgets, and Tony grins.

 

"Jarvis?", Tony asks, and all conversation stops.

 

 "Yes, sir?"

 

"Check Deadpool's vitals, please.

 

"Checking..."

 

"I'm fine, dude.", Deadpool chuckles nervously. "No fever or anything."

 

"Heart rate even...", Jarvis hums.

 

"Are you sure you're alright?", Peter asks him, pressing a hand to the masked forehead, leaning in close, concerned.

 

"Um..."

 

"Heart rate level spiked!", the Al says urgently. 

 

"Is...is Peter making your heart race?", Tony asks, disbelieving and amused, and Clint laughs.

 

"Oh...oh.", Peter says, awkwardly, his cheeks pink as he leans back. "Sorry."

 

"Deadpool has a crush~!", Clint sings, teasingly.

 

Peter raises his eyebrows, chocking out a: "Wha-what?"

 

Deadpool looks at him helplessly, his fist clenching. "I...No, I-"

 

"Warning!", Jarvis cries. "Blood rushing to neck and face at an alarming rate! Warning!"

 

"Oh my God, you're _blushing_!", Tony cries out, gleefully. "The Merc with the Mouth actually has a massive crush on-"

 

"Stop it.", Peter snaps at him, but Deadpool is already standing up.

 

"Warning! Blood rushing at an alarming rate to neck and-"

 

"G-Great seeing you, guys!", Deadpool laughs nervously, backing up towards the window.

 

Steve's eyes fill with guilt. "Deadpool, wait-"

 

"I really better get going. Got people to un-alive, you know? Thanks anyway!"

 

Clint's smile is gone, and he also stands to his feet. "Hey, I didn't mean to-"

 

"Don't sweat it." And the Avengers can see the forced smile through his mask.  "Deadpool has an embarrassing, schoolboy crush on Spider-Man. Who wouldn't laugh?"

 

And then Deadpool's jumping out of the window. 

 

"I thought it was funny.", Bruce says sadly. "Before I knew he was actually serious."

 

"Well, he was.", Peter snaps, glaring at him, before transferring it to Clint. "That was cruel of you."

 

Peter puts on his mask, then stomps toward the window, stopping to glare at a sheepish-looking Tony.

 

"And you have no right to embarrass someone like that, when we all know you've been crushing on Cap since before you could walk."

 

And then Peter's out the window.

 

"I didn't-", Clint starts, but Natasha stops him with a look.

 

"Tony, may I speak with you in the kitchen?", Steve says fiercely, and Tony winces.

 

* * *

 

 

"Deadpool!", Spider-Man shouts, to stop the mercenary from jumping to the next rooftop.

 

"You know, I've always wanted to fly this thing.", Deadpool says, gesturing toward the Stark helicopter.

 

"I'm sure Tony will let you.", the hero says. "After being such a jerk. Listen-"

 

"I like you, Spidey.", Deadpool says quietly.

 

Peter halts, his face growing warm. "Um."

 

"And I like Peter Parker.", Deadpool sighs. "And, you should know, Wade Wilson's crushing on them both, too."

 

"Oh?"

 

"Yeah.", Deadpool groans, kicking a stone with his foot. "He's kind of got it bad."

 

And Peter feels himself smiling. "Really?"

 

Deadpool nods, glancing at the next rooftop over.

 

"Jarvis.", Peter calls quickly, before Wade can jump. Did the Al even work on the rooftop?

 

"Yes, Spider-Man?"

 

Of course, it did. It was Tony Stark's creation, after all.

 

"Check my vitals, please."

 

"Heart rate accelerating. Blood that had previously rushed to the face is now pooling in the cheeks. Shall I contact a Shield medical agent?"

 

"No.", Peter breaths, and Deadpool is staring at him in awe. "That won't be necessary."

 

"P-Peter?", Deadpool asks nervously, stepping back, so very afraid, but so very hopeful.

 

"I'm Spider-Man, actually.", Peter says. "But I hear Peter has a huge crush on you."

 

"Since when?"

 

"Since that day you let him see your scars. And your beautiful brown eyes."

 

Deadpool's breath hitches, but he walks up until he's so very close to the masked hero.

 

"And what about Spider-Man?"

 

"Me?", Peter asks, hesitantly reaching out. Deadpool lets him, and Spider-Man pulls up the merc's mask until it's over his nose.

 

"I've got more of a crush on Wade then you, sorry."

 

Peter's leaning in now, and he pulls his mask up so he can whisper: "But you're kind of cute, too, Deadpool."

 

And then Peter's kissing him, lightly touching the scarred face, before holding the mercenary's cheeks more firmly. He's fond of the rough texture, and Deadpool seems very fond of Peter's _tongue_ -

 

"Blood rushing to groin at an alarming rate!"

 

Peter pulls away. Resting his forehead on Deadpool's broad shoulder, the hero laughs at the Al.

 

"Thank you, Jarvis.", he says.

 

* * *

 

 

Next Thursday, Tony pats Deadpool on the shoulder and apologizes. When Steve glares at him, Tony groans but says:

 

"Please forgive me, Deadpool. I was being insensitive." 

 

"It's Wade, actually."

 

And Deadpool hesitantly removes his mask, revealing his scarred face. "Wade Wilson."

 

The Avengers stare at him, and Deadpool-Wade-looks at the ground. "Yeah, it's pretty gross. I can put my mask back on if-"

 

"That's amazing!", Bruce cries, reaching out towards him like an excited child. "Can I?"

 

"Uh, sure.", Wade chuckles, and Bruce carefully touches the irritated skin, chattering about the science behind it.

 

"The Pool of Dead must be an astounding hero, for he is severely scarred.",  Thor says solemnly. "Much respect, fellow Avenger."

 

Peter grins at Wade's embarrassed look, kissing him on the cheek. This only serves to embarrass the poor man further, and Wade's red cheeks glow from under the scars, his blush visible to all of the Avengers, as he attempts to hide his face in his hands.

 

"Aww.", Tony teases, good-naturedly. "Peter's kisses make you blush?"

 

Steve rolls his eyes, before placing a small peck on the corner of Tony's mouth. Tony's cheeks heat up immediately, his pink blush covering his cheeks and the bridge of his nose.

 

"Aww.", Clint teases. "Cap's kisses make you blush?"

 

"Shut up.", Tony sulks. "Or I'm kicking you out of my tower."

 

"Steve!", Clint whines.

 

"No throwing people out of the tower, Tony."

 

"But-"

 

"No.", Steve says in his Captain America voice.

 

Tony's pout is swallowed by Steve's mouth, and Natasha demands they get a room. Wade laughs at the display, and Peter grins at their new family.

 


End file.
